I'm BACK!

At last, I have returned from my trip of Adventure and Awesome.
I called it 'The Quest for the search of Adventure and Awesome in Turkey and Greece. I thought it sounded fitting.
So it began with me hopping on the flying sausage and landing in Vancouver-land. I met up with my relatives and then we hopped on another flying not-so-sausage and landed in Amsterdam. The plane from Home-land to Vancouver-land had freaking terrible turbulence but it was awesome-like a roller coaster-and the one to Amsterdam had almost no turbulence and I threw up 5 minutes before landing. It sucked. But anywho, we got off the plane and toured around Amsterdam-land where we hopped on a tour boat and went through the canals and the tour boat guide-dude was funny. He was criticizing politics the whole time. After that we hopped on another flying not-so-sausage and landed in Istanbul-land at midnight. Some dude got us a crappy, expensive hotel that had like, no covers on the bed, but it was the only place that was open at such a profound hour so we took it for the night, but then switched to a hostel down the road the next day. The hostel was pretty cool and we met a family there from Czech-land, and they had three kids, and we had three kids (including me) and we all had the same ages so I have a buddy from Czech and he has a cool accent and he was pretty. Then we toured around Istanbul-land and went to the Grand Bazaar where we found freaking awesome stuff everywhere and I bound a purple leather bound journal there and stuff. There are people in the Grand Bazaar who are payed to walk around and offer people tea. We had apple tea, which was freaking amazing so I bought a package of it when we went to the spice market and I bought a package of black tea for my sister Becka and not I regret not getting more apple tea because it tastes awesomesauce in a can of liquid jesus bacon. Don't ask what awesomesauce in a can of liquid jesus bacon is, I just sorta made that up on the spot. So we stayed at the hostel for a couple days and my Czech buddy gave me Czech chocolate which was really tasty. I kept the wrapper and put it in my journal. We visited the Blue Mosque, where we had to take off our shoes and women had to put on a shawl. The floor was carpeted quite well and it looked really cool inside. Matty, my cousin, got his cheek pinched a lot. But continuing. We also visited an ancient palace and a museum that that was first a church, but then the muslims were all like, 'No. This place is ours.' So they took the church and messed it up a bit and turned it into a mosque. The muslims weren't happy with the Christians because they made pictures of their saints and in muslim religion you never make pictures of saints, people, or anything that is of 'god's creations' in sacred places. They use calligraphy instead. The loopy-schloopy writing looks pretty cool though. So we toured around there then we went to an underground museum that was made a really long time ago by Greeks. the Greekish people placed giant medusa heads at the bottom of a couple pillars there; one upside-down, the other on its side. They don't know what it signifies, but it was placed that way deliberately. A security guard down there got all angry-face at us because my cousins and I were wandering without 'parental guidance'. According to my ticket in there though, I'm an adult. ._.
Silly security guards. We had dinner that night with a freaking huge pomegranate that was about the size of a bowling ball. o.o My cousins made a deal with me that if they were good and didn't fight for the whole day they'd each get 2.5 litre bottles of Fanta. I kept my promise and they each got their giant freaking bottles of soda. That was 5 litres of Fanta worth less than $4 Canadian. I like the cheapness of Turkey. :D
Then the next day we went to a Turkish bath house. I've never been to one before so I was horribly confused. We stashed our clothes in lockers and wore swimwear-type underwear underneath a towel that hid our chest. That was it. Underwear and a towel. And some women wore nothing at all. The image of those naked women have been burned into my retinas for the rest of my life. I was on self service so I would have to remove my towel and get scrubbed down. The room where basically everything happened was a large, dim room with a giant platform made of marble in the middle. The room was very hot and the platform was heated to an even hotter temperature. I was in a compartment off the side of the room where I was alone, confused, and could only use my powers of observation to figure out what to do. There were large basins of water in there, and a hot running tap and a cold running tap. Then there were metal bowls. I had some soap I was given for self service so I did only what I thought I was supposed to do. I took a bowl, filled it with hot water, drenched my hair, then scrubbed myself down with the soap and washed it off with the bowl of water. A woman who worked there kept on walking to to fetch water to clean off the platform and eventually noticed I was confused and told me to sit on a shelf on the floor and dump water on myself. She passed me a bottle of shampoo and left. I was quite thankful for that. I didn't feel like sitting alone for another 10 confused minutes. So after I was done that Auntie Cory and Grandma and I went into a hot tub. They removed their towels to go in, but I was like, 'ehhhhhhhh. No.' So I went in with my towel on but nobody said I didn't have to. After that we went into a different room where we changed into dry towels and lounged. Then eventually we got changed again and went back to the hostel.
So after that we left Istanbul-land and went  hopped on a boat to the other side of Turkey, where I got on the ferry seconds before they removed the gang-plank and cast off. We went to a place called Cappadocia-land. We took an over-night train to get there, where I got locked out of my cabin when I went to go to the bathroom. It was a pretty cool overnight train, though the cabins were small. Eventually at about 6am we arrived in Ankara-land and we took a bus to get to Cappadocia-land. That place was really cool. The cousins and Uncle Jim and Auntie Cory went on a balloon ride, and Zac bought a beer, and we went on a tour where I had to sit behind three spanish guys on the tour bus. It wasn't really all that bad actually, but I must say I've never seen three Spanish guys that are all gay with each-other. And love anime. The tour was awesome, we went to underground cities and went along a giant trail to get to a city nearby where we had lunch, which was really good. The tourists on the bus consisted of us six Canadians, a loner Japanese dude, a Japanese couple, their friend, and of course, the Spaniards. We went back to our hotel in Cappadocia-land after, and I sat in the lounge and went on the internets on Grandma's iPod Touch of lameness when a cat hopped up on my lap. He was all 'HEYYYYYY! I'M A CAT! IMMA SIT ON YOUR LAP OKAY?! OKAY! :D' and I was all, 'Ok fine.' And then another cat hopped up on my lap. And he was all, 'HEYYYYYYYY! I'M A CAT TOO! IMMA SIT ON YOUR LAP TOO ALRIGHT?! OKAY! :D' and I was all, 'Ok fine. Gawd. Just don't piss on me or anything gross like that.'
Then I looked down. Two more cats were sitting there. Staring at me with those same 'HEYYYYYYY! I'M A CAT! :D' eyes. I felt a bit disturbed. The receptionist, who I like to call 'pretty dude' 'cause he was pretty, just sorta laughed at me. Eventually one of the cats left, but the other one didn't, so I picked him up and took him off my lap but he was all, 'NOOOOOO! WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING TO SOMEONE AS ADORABLE AS MEEE?!' then hopped back on my lap. I was all, 'Silly cat.'

Just to break for a moment, I was writing the previous stuff in Info Tech class (computer class) and now I'm in elective class, where I should be taking Norwegian, but I've been working hard for the past couple days in Norwegian so I'm taking a bit of time in this class to write this out.

After spending a few awesome days in Cappadocia-land we took an over-night bus to Pamukkale-land. On the way to Pamukkale-land we stopped for a break and I went to the bathroom there, where I spotted a cat walking out of one of the bathroom stalls. It was quite interesting. Pamukkale-land is known for a freaking huge glacier right in the edge of the city. The glacier is tens of thousands of years old...and is made of calcium carbonate. The water that runs off of it is hot, and there are fresh hot springs all through it, which was totally beast. When we arrived in Pamukkale-land there was a dude that drove us to his hotel, along with a bunch of other people and we sat down in the lobby and talked about whether we wanted to stay there or got to another hotel. The dude was offering us awesome deals but he sounded scary, the place wasn't that great, and I was really tired and fell asleep sitting upright. We decided to go down the street and found a nicer hotel with an awesome receptionist who had an Australian accent. she was pretty cool. The rooms were nice and they had a pool, jacuzzi, and sauna outside. Eventually we went to the giant glacier thing and we walked through there and there was lots of international tourists, including some weird German guy who had a facial expression war with me. I won.
Further up the giant freaking glacier hill was an area with lots of grass and a few hills and such. We wandered through there and took pictures of the ancient ruins that were scattered through the area and found an ample theatre that was being restored. Then we walked back down and went to our hotel. We visited some more ruins and stuff in Pamukkale-land, then we went to another city called Bodrum-land.
Bodrum-land was...interesting. We accidentally went into a restricted area (but we didn't get caught) and I bought a model ship at a small tourist shop. There was hundreds, no, thousands of boats in the harbour. I was happy. I love boats. We got a nice hotel where I shared a room with Grandma, and they had a dalmatian there which made me sad because I missed my dalmatian named Hunter who died a couple years ago. D:
There was a dude there who I have dubbed 'creepy dude' because he was like, 19 and he was flirting with me. I was all, 'Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Too old. And too creepy.' But not to his face. Instead I ripped a page from my sketchbook, drew a totally morbid and creepy picture with lots of blood and gore and giggled evilly while drawing it. He got creeped out and I felt victorious. Then I dropped it on the table I was sitting at and left him to stare at it mortified. We went to a place there where we had fish for dinner, but we got to choose the fish we wanted to eat. It was pretty epic. The dude there taught us how to make paper roses in case 'we forgot flowers for our date'. I thought it was quite brilliant. But anywho, we went to the Eugene Sea not-land, and I took the pride of touching the sea before anyone else. It was warm, but there was lots of rocks that wanted to stab their pointy parts into the tender soles of my feet. D:
I made friends with a cat there. :D
We went for ice cream every day there and it was really good. I normally had chocolate with cappuccino. We did lots of stuff there that I can't remember, but I will make a total update later with absolutely EVERYTHING that happened in it. So then we hopped on a boat with really bad turbulence and waves and stuff (where Zac threw up) to an island called Kos-land, where we spent the day doing nothing and then we hopped on another boat at night to get to some random city where we'd go to Athens-land. The big boat was 3x the size of a BC ferry and it was really posh. The cabins had four beds, a closet, a computer desk, two chairs, a bench, and a bathroom with a shower and stuff in it. There was some light turbulence when morning came around, so I sat on the floor and watched people try to walk around, but they kept on getting thrown off because of the waves so whenever they took a step they stumbled like they were drunk. It was funny as hell to watch. I felt sick though so I threw up. But then I ate breakfast, which was an omelet, but I was unhappy because they didn't have croissants. Then Matt and I went out on deck where it was so windy you could barely walk ni some areas. Then I took a shower. Then we got off the boat. Then we took a bus to Athens-land. Where the butler on the bus stole Matty's Nintendo DS and started playing on it. We got to Athens-land and got ourself a hostel to stay in, and then Zac and I wandered through the market for a while.
When Auntie Cory and Uncle Jim were hostel hunting we stayed in the Athens-land town square where we were quite entertained by street performers who did some crazy dancing stuff. Our hotel had internets so I went on the computer and sent some emails and such, and then we toured around Athens-land, went to some ruins, toured the markets, bought 'This is SPARTA!' t-shirts, and then we went to ThisIsSparta-land. That place was awesome.
We saw the Greek Independence Day parade with lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of soldiers. Some had RPGs, others had big guns, and one dude had a cross bow. :D
After that we rented a car and drove to some place where we planned on staying for the long Independence Day weekend, but everyone from Athens-land went there, so we went to another town called something-or-another-land. I don't remember the name. Fort Minor-band probably doesn't like me for that.
We stayed in a bungallo there by the seaside and did fun stuff and drank orange juice and then we went back to Athens-land and stayed a cheap but posh hostel and then we hopped on an airplane and flew to Amsterdam-land and stayed there for a few hours and I felt sick. D:
Then we went to Vancouver, and then home.

The bell just rang so Imma update and fix this all later. okbye.